Shallow Husband!?
Anyone else having trouble with a shallow husband. Mine all of a sudden turned into a very shallow man. He has no desire to have sex with men and when we finally talked about it he said it was my weight. I am 29 weeks pregnant and i have put on a few... I put on 20 before we got pregnant when i quit smoking and i have put on another 30 since pregnant. I have always struggled with my weight so it is no suprise. So why now that i am 7 months pregnant does he feel the need to tell me he has a problem with my weight. He said not now while you are pregnant!!!! why would he tell me know then? we have been together the better part of 7 years since we started dating... so he tells me this now? We got married 9 months ago? I am just so hurt and he really has no idea how hurt i am. He has put on a few pounds too. He just never in all the years we have been together been so mean and shallow. I feel like hiding.
I just want to know if anyone else has this problem... not interested in people telling me what a jerk my husband is - that will just make me feel worse - cause i already know and this is pretty new behavior. So please let me know if anyone has this issue... or something like it.
First I will say that I don't understand his behavior. My wife is heavy and pregnant, but I love her for who she is, not matter how heavy or thin or whatever. But anyway, on to my advice. Tell him how you feel. I have read a lot of posts on these boards from women complaining about insensitive men. I'm betting that in most of the cases the men were not trying to be hurtful in any way, and that they probably don't even realize what they have done. If women don't tell us what the problem is, more often then not we won't figure it out. That is just our nature. Communication is the key. Don't expect or wait for your DH/SO to figure out what the problem is.
Re: Shallow Husband!?
My DH is also having problems with since I've gotten pregnant, but mine is not a weight issue, it's more he feels weird about having sex with his "child" in the same room. Sigh. He also said he got out of the habit, as we hadn't had sex in so long, I had really bad morning sickness for the first 4 months, so now I'm ready and rearing to go...he's like Woah.
I would definitely sit down and talk with your DH and tell him how your words hurt you. Don't make a big crying scene (which I know is hard when your pregnant and your hormones are racing), but talk to him honestly. There are other things you two can do to renew the intimacy and the closeness without actually DTD. But I think he needs to know how he made you feel. I think sometimes we (I'm saying we as we all sometimes run our mouths when we don't mean it) say things without realizing how they can hurt someone. You need to let him know.
Re: Shallow Husband!?
Remember your giving birth to HIS child!!!!!! uuuugrh, men sometimes make me so angry!
I would shut him off unitl you say so---
until then, try to talk w/ himabout it, what brought his feelings on...etc...
hth., your not the only one with a dh liek that...
mine is freaked out his penis is going to slap the baby in the forehead!!!!!!
shallow husband
Going thru the same thing -- realized I was the one initiating it and then the other night, DH said "not tonight. Maybe in the morning". Claimed it was because my stomach was kicking him.
After a sleepless night of thinking he was having an affair, was going to leave me yada yada yada. Had a tearful confrontation -- of course he was the wronged party. Basically he's not "comfortable" with it. I haven't gained that much weight. Heck -- HE'S overweight and I've never brought that up to him. Basically my feelings are hurt, I feel hideous and am worried about once the baby's born if things will ever be the same. To make matters worse, I've found he's been surfing internet port sites, which makes me even more paranoid. He's always looked at those types of pictures, but just makes me feel even worse.
Shallow Husband!?
since I've gotten pregnant, but mine is not a weight issue, it's more he feels weird about having sex with his "child" in the same room. Sigh. He also said he got out of the habit, as we hadn't had sex in so long, I had really bad morning sickness for the first 4 months, so now I'm ready and rearing to go...he's like Woah.
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